Austin Carr, karmic juggernaut

            With the midpoint of the NBA season drawing closer and closer, the sustained success of the Cleveland Cavaliers, who boast an absurd 11.8 point margin of victory on the year, has raised eyebrows around the league. The Cavs have dominated from the get-go, something that some attribute to the stellar play of LeBron James, who pulls down a tidy 27.5 points, 6.7 rebounds, and 6.7 assists per game. Others would say Cleveland’s success rests on the shoulders of newcomer Mo Williams, who provides a legitimate number two scoring option, taking some of the pressure off LeBron. Still others would point out the performance of Cleveland’s role players, providing tough interior defense, rebounding and perimeter shooting. While the play of James and Williams, as well as the rest of the Cavs rotation has done much to get them off to such a great start, one hundred percent of the credit for Cleveland’s meteoric rise lies squarely on the shoulders of their lovable, gregarious shooting guard with career averages of 15.4 points, 2.9 rebounds, and 2.8 assists per game. I am talking, of course, of Mr. Cavalier himself, the indispensable Austin Carr.

           As anyone who watches the Cavaliers regularly is no doubt aware of, Austin Carr is the heart and soul of their sometimes biased, always dynamic announce team. As the color commentator, Carr is free from the confines of describing each play as it occurs; rather, he meanders his way through various subjects that may or may not relate to the sport of basketball in a deep, fruity voice that ranges from slightly slurred to indecipherable, depending on his level of emotional investment in the play at hand. All it takes is for LeBron James to go to the hoop with a full head of steam for Austin to start rising from his seat, muttering something about the “L-Train” under his breath. His volume directly correlates to James’ proximity to the rim, culminating in a fantastic cacophony when the basket is converted. “And the L-Train takes it straight to the hole!”

           In addition to “L-Train”, throughout the course of a game Austin Carr is wont to make references to “Big Z”, “Big Ben”, “Mo”, “Andy”, and, intriguingly, “The Q”. Austin Carr mentions “The Q” in varying capacities roughly once every five sentences, more if the games is going to or returning from a commercial break. The general consensus is that “Q” stands for Quicken Loans Arena, the venue in which Cleveland plays its home games; this, however, is complete conjecture, based on nothing but guesswork and context.  The most used line in Mr. Cavalier’s repertoire, “Q” is generally tacked on to any sentence Mr. Cavalier finds himself unable to complete. “And the L-Train takes it straight to the hole, in the Q!... The L-Train... In the Q, straight to the hole!” (Statements like these are generally cut off by partner Fred McLeod, who has been clearing his throat and trying to cut to commercials for the past seven seconds)

           With his status as a hero in the city of Cleveland, his history as a Cavalier, his team bias that makes Tommy Heinsohn look like a conscientious objector, his calls that stick with listeners long after the game is over (“Oh, trick ‘em, L-Train! Trick ‘em, L-Train!”), and his awkward yet functional chemistry with Fred McLeod, Austin Carr is a karmic savant, an intangible source of good will that causes big shots to drop, questionable whistles to blow, and loose balls to bounce in the right direction. He asks for no notoriety for his contributions, nor does he receive any, in stark contrast to the sporting world’s other symbols of good luck. The media heaps praise upon the gaudy Rally Monkey of the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim, who has been called a prima donna after giving a pedestrian effort during the ALDS last season. The loud, abrasive, “We Believe” t-shirt employed by the Golden State Warriors is also somewhat of a media darling. However, despite its flashy play, it has consistently shown it doesn’t have what it takes to get the job done. These are the polar opposites of Austin Carr, who day in and day out gets up, punches his timecard, and goes to work.

           While he may not have the sizzle, Mr. Cavalier has every last scrap of the steak. What he lacks in flash, he makes up for in results. He's a proven, battle tested veteran, the definiton of cagey, with playoff experience and a mean streak as wide as his team's margin of victory. So watch out league, because this L-Train has left the station. Next stop: the NBA Finals.